How to complain without hurting your partner

How to complain without hurting your partner

How to complain without hurting your partner   This is a simple & effective way  to bring up difficult issues: 1) Choose your time carefully- ideally when you are both relaxed & getting on 2) Most of what we communicate is not through our words but through our tone & body language- so make sure that you are in the right frame of mind  by reminding yourself before you start of all the things you like about your partner-& the things that they do right! 3) Start with”I” + emotion, for instance, ” I am upset”, “I am hurt” , ” I am scared”. 4) Now name your complaint & make it SPECIFIC, for instance, ” that the kitchen was a mess this morning”, ”  ” when I look at our bank balance”. 5) Ask for what you need ( optional) for instance, ” we need to find better ways of managing our money”. Research shows that the beginning of a conversation predicts how it will end. In the best relationships people are gentle with each other. Start in the way you mean to go on. Some people, however gently you start a difficult discussion, have had so many bad experiences of feeling attacked & criticized in the past that they will feel attacked and get defensive no matter how you begin. In this case, the best thing to do is to clearly state that you don’t mean to attack or criticise them but  rather want  to let them know how this specific thing has made you feel  &  what they can do to help. it is important to...

Free talk: How to treat anxiety, panic attacks and PTSD

Ann Marie Taylor will be giving a free talk entitled: How to treat anxiety, panic attacks, flashbacks and PTSD: the Human Givens Approach at 8pm on Tuesday 11th of October at Swann Hall, St Patrick’s Church, Greystones. Free talk: How to treat anxiety, panic attacks and PTSD: the Human Givens approach There have been huge developments over the last 15 years, in neuroscience and psychology, of the understanding of the trauma reactions, fear responses and survival mechanisms that underlie most common emotional health issues. The Human Givens Approach to psychotherapy combines knowledge and breakthroughs from these fields with the most effective techniques developed over the history of psychotherapy and coaching. It was described by the journal New Scientist as “a quiet revolution”. Human Givens Therapy offers reliable & practical help in relieving a wide range of emotional & stress-related issues. It is structured and starts from where the client is now and focuses on moving them forward, as quickly as possible, to where they want to be and how they want to live. This therapy can help people sleep well; feel calmer and be more relaxed; improve their self-esteem; Improve their relationships; reduce the amount of time spent dwelling on the past & manage stress.  ...